Bipolar disorder struck me in 2003, when I was a 47-year-old colonel and brigade commander in Iraq. I served the next 11 years with an unrecognized, undiagnosed, and worsening mental illness.
By 2014, something was seriously wrong with my brain. After rocketing into full-blown mania and being removed from command in July 2014, I crashed into depression and psychosis. In November 2014, I was finally diagnosed. For two years I battled for my sanity and my life before beginning my recovery.
How did my bipolar go undiagnosed for 11 years? There were warning signs, but no one recognized them. I, and the people around me, were untrained in identifying the basic symptoms of bipolar disorder. I believe the military’s culture masked and incentivized my manic behavior. My mania helped me thrive, although it always bordered on dangerous. There are changes the military can make to improve recognition, prevention, and treatment of mental illness. In addition, there are things service members should know and do to deal with mental health disorders.
